The boys from Haiti

I have 2 boys from Haiti in my classroom. They are cousins of one of our students. Their families got out of Haiti after the earthquake and they want to give the children a close to normal life. So they took them at our school not to receive a formal education but to be in a normal environment. The problem is that they only talk french. Even though they are second graders they put them at my classroom because my 2 assistant teachers know french. Today was their first day and I can tell you it was not easy for me. It’s difficult for me not being able communicate and to control my other very excited 35 children. My children were thrilled and they welcome them with open arms and I could see they were happy. But they can’t do much and I don’t want them to get bored.I don’t know how this is going to work but I will do the best that I can. Another learning experience.

Another opportunity

I didn’t feel like writing these days. I have been a little bit down going through a lot of emotions this week. The beginning of school hasn’t been good for me. Some things have happened this week that left me a little bit shaken emotionally. I can’t hide that I’m not good for changes. Hate changes. Changes always scare me. I wish everything will remain the same. I like the stability, the security that it gives. But I have no control over some things . Like it or not. The things that I want to change those don’t change but what I like to remain the same that change. Well I have to get used to it. It’s not the first time. I have to get some new things of interest to me. New hopes. Like the one I’m going to tell you about now. Do you remember the Brother that I used to fight with? The one that one day I came to his office to complain about construction noise? Well he has a change a lot with me. I don’t why. But I’m giving him a chance. I hope he doesn’t disappoint me again. My 2 friends from Guatemala always tell me that he is a good man. He is showing that side to me now. I don’t know why he has change with me. I don’t know if it because I’m not longer invisible at school. Maybe because he is seeing me getting more involved with school things. Maybe the heart felt words of thanks in Guatemala. Or the fact that I brought all the school supplies for him to give to needed children. The thing is that he is helping me in some way. The other day at school he came out of the library as I was passing by and called me to tell that the librarian wanted to talk to me. It was about some supplies that they needed microphones and cables. They know that my husband used to have these things at the store. I am so negative these days that as soon as they started to tell me they needed some things I started to tell them that my husband didn’t have the store anymore, etc ,e tc. Thank God they insisted and I started to realize that they were right. Why not? My husband still has some things at our house and he still has his contacts. He has told me before that if someone wanted something he could get it. I almost loose a change to get some much needed money because of my negative thinking. An opportunity that God sent me. How many have we left go by?  All of this in front of the Brother. Later I did learn that it was his idea to give it me to me. While we were there talking we started to talk about this year Solidarity trip. Every year the school takes some students and teachers to one of our school in a very poor town in Nicaragua. They go to help and spend some time with the students and their families at the school and at their homes. This trip is not payed by the school everbody pays their part but it is very cheap. I just made the comment that I would love to go sometime. The Brother told me that if I have the enthusiasm and the will then I should go. I told him that I have that but what i don’t have is the money. He told me that that wasn’t a problem. That they would take of that. He told me that he was coounting with me.  What? I and the people with me were surprised. He invited me. But it left me thinking if I should go. I have just returned from 2 weeks in Guatemala without my family. This trip is for a week in April. Not only that even if it was wonderful the trip to Guatemala took a toll in me emotionally. Could I handle another? This one is different. I’m going to come face to face with real poverty. I’m going to help to be with them. A lifetime opportunity.  I couldn’t refuse it was another God given opportunity. Why me ? Why now? I think I need it. After thinking about it and asking friends for advice the next day I talked to the Brother again. I asked him all the details again I told him I didn’t have the money. He just asked me again and again; Do you want to go? I told him yes and then he told me Then you are going. I still don’t understand God purpose. Why is he giving me this opportunities?  In April 3 i’m going to Nicaragua for a week with 3 other teachers, some high school students and the Brother. I’m going to see how he really is my friends tell me. Either we fight the whole trip or become lifetime friends. JA! No really I can imagine myself with those kids and their families, my camera and the notebook that my friend gave me. Writing about my experiences. Just living. Ahh Guatemala I’m planning on going back. I have some unfinished business, so many places I didn’t see and some places that I want to go back and take my husband. I just have to wait . Even If our economic situation doesn’t change I’m going. In December of this year I’m going to receive a bonus for my 10 years working at the school. I’m going to use that money to go to Guatemala. Holy week 2011.

This week has to be different

I hope this week is different. I have to make it different. I know its up to me but I have been feeling a little ( or a lot) on the down side. I don’t know why but this week have been terrible for me. I have been very nervous and drowning in a glass of water for every little thing. I don’t have the will to do anything. I guess maybe it’s time for my happy pills again. I don’t like feeling like this and I have to do something about it as soon as possible. For my sake and my loved ones. I have to be strong. I have to deal with other problems at home and now I’m not strong enough. And at school…well I need the enthusiasm. I already lost the one I had when I came back from Guatemala and I don’t want to. I don’t want to forget what I lived. I have to be a testimony. I have to get back my joy. Soon! The other day some of my co workers made a comment about it. Sarcasm. Like with all the things that I believe in I started to defend it with a little too much passion. They don’t understand. They don’t get it. All of this is because our spiritual retreat is coming in February. They don’t like to go. Last year they had to and all of them went to bars before going and when they arrive they were all drunk. I don’t understand. I am going this year even though I don’t have too. I want to go. Let’s see how this week go. On other things  a picture of me and Cristian when he was a baby is going to be on a very famous television series. You already know my aunt is an actress and she does the mother of one of the characters of this series. Well she needed for one of the chapters one picture of her with a baby . Well she doesn’t have any pictures with her sons so she asked me to send her one to see if they could use it. Well they loved it. They are going to use it  and they are going to pay 100.00 just to use it. Not bad.

This week so far

I have to admit it hasn’t been a good start. Since school started on Monday I have had so many things on my mind that I have been distraught. So much that people have noticed. I don’t have my mind in this, that’s all. I have to focus on what I’m doing and leave problems and other things at home. This week I haven’t been able to achieve that. I’m doing my things at school but in automatic not giving them much thought. This week I also had to stay until 5:30 working and that is not helping.I have to cover for a sick friend and right now I need the money so I couldn’t say no. I have to change and finally start this semester as it should be. One thing I did was talk with the Brother in charge about the school supplies that the crew gave me. He is going to help me get the things to children that really need them in one or two of our schools. That made me really happy. This weekend are the famous Fiestas de La Calle San Sebastian. I’m going with Vivi on Saturday. I’m going during the day I don’t know If we are going to stay to see the craziness during the night, It is that it takes so long to get in and out of San Juan. Let’s see.

School again

Tomorrow is back to every day routine. Back to work. Let’s see what this semester brings. Tomorrow as soon as I can I’m going to talk to the social worker about all the school supplies. I hope she is able to help to do something very good with them that also involves my children. Every classroom has to do social work once every year and mine hasn’t done it yet.

The Red Carpet

Yes Ryan, the Cruise director of the Carnival Glory, rolled out the red carpet for us and made us feel like VIPs the entire time we spent onboard the ship. He really made John proud. We really did not expect such treatment. Since I started to write to him about our visit he was very nice. He came to pick us up at the gangway and gave us a ship tour. We went all over the ship talking and taking pictures. I can hide that it felt very good that the cruise director himself was taking such good care of us. Who are we? We were really happy. My friend from Guatemala who has never been on a cruise ship was very impressed with the treatment that we were getting and with the ship. She was very happy.. we all were .The ship is beautiful!! Is colors, colors everywhere. We took great pictures. We could see that Ryan has a very good relationship with all the employees of the ship. Looking forward to one day being on a ship that he is the CD. After giving us a ship tour he took us to the Lido were he left us to have lunch. Imagine. We ate a lot. After that we were supposed to call him for him to meet us again and give us a backstage tour and the boxes. Well we met at the show lounge he gave us the tour and gave us our boxes. We can thank him and John enough. They really made our day. Another special day onboard a Carnival ship. Carnival can be proud of their employees. Everyone so nice! Well and what can I say about my Evil Crew friends? I was overwhelmed by the quantity of things that you gave me. I’m going to talk with the school social worker to give all this to children that really need them. Ahhh and I really like my ambassador shirt. Love it Love it!! And it fits perfect. Who is teh next one coming? I’m dying to wear it. JA!! No really I am truly blessed to have all of you and John in my life. I got lots of pictures of my visit to the Glory. They are on facebook. Not only mine but my nephews also. Go see then.

Just another day

Today we celebrated Three Kings day here in Puerto Rico. Just another day for us this year. Nothing special. The good thing was that finally my parents are home and that they are staying with me until tomorrow morning. I’m going to say that today was not a very good day for me. Tomorrow we are going to have lunch onboard the Carnival Glory. I was looking forward to finally get my friends onboard a cruise ship after what happened with the Dream. My nephews are also very excited. But this morning one of my friends called me to tell me that the other is not going. He doesn’t feel like going. I was dissapointed. I can’t hide it. That and some other little things that happened today plus not being able to do something special today got me. Tomorrow is another day and we are supposed to be onboard the Carnival Glory at 12:30. CD Ryan has been in touch with me and he seems very nice. Can’t wait to meet him. We are going to see the ship, have lunch at the buffet and finally get the boxes from the Evil crew. It sounds like it’s going to be a good day. Today is a day that I really can say that I missed a special garden, the peace that I can feel there and a really good friend to hear me.

A good start

Last night we celebrated the New Year at my house. It was definitely a good start when I saw my nephew’s father at my house. Do you remember him? He was my sister in law husband the one with the disease hiding in his house. Well last night I saw him after many months and he looks great! Right now he is like he used to be. Last night I saw him as the caring father and good man that he was. That made me really happy. A good start for a new year. I don’t know how long he is going to be like this but it gave me hope. One can only hope for a miracle. Not only that we received the new year with a lot of laughter, dancing and singing in the street. Yes in the street. I saw it like a good sign. I will start the year with hope, faith and a lot of enthusiasm. Let’s see how it goes.

A new year always a new hope

2009 is coming to an end. Not many mayor events or something very significant this year. It was a quiet year at least for my family. I guess that is good because nothing bad happened either. Everything has remained more or less the same. We have the blessing of being together and in good health. That’s what I want , what I need. The only thing that remains the same is that Eugenio still needs a job and we need to sell the building but we have survived another year in our current economic situation. God is still holding us. Other than I had the blessing of finding new friends. Aaaahhh my school angels!! How much I needed them and how much it changed my situation at school. Our times together and our refugee. Our summer how different it was from the others. So much fun! Going out the 4 of us. My change of attitude toward school and the unconditional friendship of my friend from Guatemala when the others slowly drifted apart. But with no doubt in my mind the most important thing for me this year was my trip to Guatemala. In many ways it was an unforgettable experience. It touched my life in so many ways!!  They were the two most amazing,intense two weeks were I learned so much about me. Two weeks only for me in a incredible place were I meet many wonderful people. So many feelings…. so much love. There God also gave me the gift of another dear friend and getting to know a beautiful country. Well and next year ? I wish that God gives me the blessing of good health for me and my loved ones. I also wish for our situation to finally change. It would be good to sell the building and for Eugenio to find a full time job. I wish everybody a very good year 2010. Hope for the best. Thank you God for this year and everything that I have.

My Christmas

It went well but it wasn’t the same without my family. My parents are in Dallas with my brother and my sister were they had an unusual white christmas. They are having a great time and I am happy for then but I really missed then. For Christmas eve we went to my husband’s cousins house. It was nice because we were all together but there was also a lot of other people that we didn’t know. For Christmas we went to my mother in law were there was the usual craziness when all the cousins are together. We don’t even know were we are going to celebrate the New Year. This Christmas has been really quiet. It’s ok I’m really just enjoying my time off. I wonder what this New Year will bring me. I hope that we can finally sell the building. But I also hope for a new job for my husband. More stability. This year wasn’t bad it was just a struggle. Struggling in many aspects of my life. But I’m getting there. I’m just fighting for what I want. That is not bad. And this year also left me some good things like my trip to Guatemala.I’m just grateful that everyone is ending this year in good health and together. That should be enough.